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October 30, 2005



Love love the loafers! Raising an eyebrow at the white belt though... And, AJ, you silly granny pervert, she's just hot for you. She wants to bake you cookies and show you a few tricks with her chocolate chips, big daddy.

special sauce

Actually, the article was "Neatly Dressed Miscreants and Hooligans- Helping You Across the Street, or Helping You Straight Into the Morgue?" It was a 6 part expose in Parade magazine. (Right between Marilyn Vos Savant and that In Step with James Brady.)

And I swear I only know it because it was the talk of the Codger Corral a few weeks ago.


I thought I was the only one who felt that way about "Sideways." Between the rambling saxophonist-on-crack jazz and the "all pinot, all the time" theme, I wanted to bang my head against the wall.


I just stopped by and I like you blog. This was a cute post.

always write

Old lady in a track suit...? Sounds Jewish to me. She'd never trust a shaygitzah punim like yours. Wait 'til Hannukah and wish her a "good yontiff," then you're TOTALLY in.


i wish i had your problem..! mine is just the opposite, both the aging community and small children seem freakishly drawn to me... the pierced ears and lebret doesn't faze them... the shaggy hair i'm sporting these days has no effect either...

next time try this ensemble: cargo shorts, long-sleeved baseball t-shirt and birks (notice no belt)... it seemed to work particularly well in both von's and ralph's today since i got asked for assistance at both...

maybe we should hang out and befuddle the hell out of them... ;)


Is it my pastel tattersall button-down shirt with jauntily rolled-up sleeves that screams “Violent Senior Citizen Offender”?


Is it because of my cuffed jeans and brown suede loafers that I project “Retiree Ravager”?


Do you take notice of my white canvas belt and wonder how many Granny Notches adorn it?


don't worry, she doesn't think you look like a rapist. If anything, that clothing make you look like a homo.


and for the love of god, please enable HTML in your comments, so i can quote you and not look like a moron.



I never know what to comment because I'm usually laughing so hard the words just won't come to me!!!!


Melissa-- Hot granny! Giggity giggity giggity.

Sauce-- Ah... see... I let my subscription lapse.

Merujo-- Sideways is definitely the hip movie to like. Honestly, did anyone REALLY like it? I mean, really.

Cleavage-- *giggle*

7d-- Ha! As long as I don't have to wear OPEN TOED sandals.

Lexie-- Yeah, I get suspicious looks from grandpas, too.

Lexie-- I have a feeling that you'll still look like a moron. Regardless of your ability to hyperlink.

Jagagagag-- Just say "Jax wuz here". That's good enough for me. :-)


AJ, you can try to laugh it away all you like. But the truth is that there's a lustful, wanton beast lurking just beneath the surface of your A&F clad exterior...and Pearl could sense that.


You sayin' I wanted to give Pearl a "pearl necklace"?


"*giggle*"...that's another reason the grandpas look at you suspiciously.

and i guess what i SHOULD have said was "please, for the love of god enable HTML so i can make my comments pretty enough for your pretty boy blog.



Lexie, you're not getting HTML. So you'll have to just use ASCII art.


."". ."",
| | / /
| | / /
| | / /
| |/ ;-._
} ` _/ / ;
| /` ) / /
| / /_/\_/\
|/ / |
( ' \ '- |
\ `. /
| |
| |

in australia, that doesn't mean "peace".


okay, im done with your comments section. it totally screwed up my ASCII masterpiece.

that delete button is your friend. hint, hint.


In Australia, that doesn't mean "peace" and with a non-monospaced font, that doesn't mean anything.

But thanks for playing. Please take home, as a consolation prize, a lifetime supply of turtle wax.


okay, i admit it.

rigth now, i look like a moron. but i have turtle wax and a copius amount of red wine to help me deal. so i'll be FINE.

as long as i don't come back here and read these comments when i'm sober.


Sounds good. I'll bring over my turtle.



okay, i'm done.

for reals.


Hey aj
You must be living in a retirement condo eh? So are these the "neighbors you hear doin' it above you? She is probably lookin' at you with the "vibes" and you missed it! what you thought was a smirk was a wink and her wink just got lost in the wrinkle and Luckily though she won't remember you later due to alzheimers! But a white belt, umm brings back those 70's memories. With much fondness .. J


I'm sick and tired of all these men who walk around in their brown suede loafers and then say "Oh, no, I'm not a rapist. Why are you stereotyping me! Call the ACLU!" Back in my day, the only ones who would dare wear loafers in October were rapists. Now, all the kids wear them because they seem "edgy" and "dangerous." Whatever happened to dressing with respect? Is it any wonder that good citizens are responding to you in this way. Grow up, young man!


I felt the same way about sideways. So much hype, so little production.

Maybe she's afraid you're going to steal her letters?


Was the point of this post that you didn't like Sideways? Because in that case, you deserved to BE raped by Granny! That was genius film-making, truly a modern cinema achievement of unparalleled breadth (and depth!) that made me both examine myself, and the guy next to me in the theater.


All jokes aside, the elderly are really scared of this world ... and I don't blame them.

Just try to keep it in your pants
(cuffed jeans?) you perverted freak you! :P

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